Sunday, January 30, 2011

Lent and friendship

Our church is soliciting the parishioners to write a devotional for the Lenten season.  I am seriously considering writing one.  I have wanted to do one for several years but always made self-deprecating excuses: I'm not a writer, no-one would want to read what I write, there are other who are better writers than me, etc.  I also made excuses like: I don't have time, what would I have to say that would lift people up and make them take stock in their walk, I don't wanna (read with a whiny high pitched voice).  But this year I think I might put all that aside, follow that small still voice inside and DO IT!  I have a verse I want to use and the content almost laid out for it.  In the next few days I might post it if I get the self-confidence.  You see that is my biggest problem, confidence.  Yes, I appear to have it all wrapped up in a neat bow (sometimes) but really deep down I question a lot of who I am and my capabilities (don't we all?).  So this year has to be my go for it year.  I have stared to write poetry (albeit very depressing but none the less very cathartic) and posted it in very public forums.  Thanks to those who follow this blog since this is where I am posting when I do choose to share the depths of my heart.  In light of writing the Lenten devotional I had an epiphany 2 nights ago that I need to write an essay on friendship, or at least my experiences with it.  As I lay in bed I had all these grand ideas of what to write...did I get up and list them on a piece of paper or even in the journal I keep by my bed??? UM, no, of course I didn't.  That would mean getting up out of the warm comfy bed I sleep in and working.  Now I regret that lack of action.  All of the eloquent ideas that were there at midnight are now gone.  I did attempt to write some things down but they all sounded trite and even a little jaded.  I don't want to be depressing in all my work, at least I want to give the positive a chance too.  While I realize this may seem a little fragmented to some I know that to those that know me best (my blog followers) it will make complete sense :-)
Much love to you all.

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

In class today I wrote this it came out of nowhere

In light of pain
There stands a
Forrest of darkness
So black the hand
Before your face
Is a chasm.
The smiles on
Others faces but
A mirage that
Fades as the
Tears begin to fall.
You grope and crawl
You hope for it all
To end and the
Sun to rise in
The east again.

~jan. 25, 2011
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Wednesday, January 12, 2011

begin

Days will pass
and not a tear
will be shed.
Laughter will
spill out honest
and true.  Jokes
will be told and
stories too.
But that doesn't
mean the sadness
has come to an
end or that the
healing has even
had a chance to
begin.

~Jan 10, 2010

Sunday, January 9, 2011

Again

I see your picture
It doesn't seem
Real. How could
It be that you
Have left us here?
My spirit longs
To be with you
Again.  It won't
Be long till that
Can happen
Again.

~Love you, sister!

A poem I posted to Karen's facebook wall tonight.  IT just came to me as I was looking at her lovely picture on Facebook.

Friday, January 7, 2011